Stage Fright

So I have been working on that whole running thing...

I've been having an on-going conversation with a neighbor about fitness and running.  The first time we talked about it, he tossed out the idea of being run buddies.  That sent me into full panic mode because I still think that I look like QWOP when I run:



When I really look like this...


Am I the fastest runner in the world?  No.  Especially when contending with stop lights and French tourists asking me where the nearest Capital Bikeshare location is. I'm not the fastest person when I took a little break between miles 3 and 4 to chat with a woman that was walking along the Potomac (she was around mile 13 that day) in preparation for walking an entire marathon. I'm not the fastest person when I stop to take photos.

Key Bridge between miles 2 and 3

Flood Gates along the Georgetown Waterfront

But I think that's what I was getting at in my last post.  I have this fear of not being good at something (*ahem* or at not being the best at something) and therefore hiding it away and not letting my friends see it.  Okay, I may not be the best runner, and may not be able to keep up with my friends that run 8-minute miles, but maybe they don't want to me to run their pace, their race.  Maybe they want to run my pace, my race. Maybe I wasn't giving them the benefit of the doubt that they wanted to show me how to shave seconds off my time, or how to be more consistent, or how to work through foot pain (seriously, right foot? what was with the cramps?).

So this weekend, I asked my neighbor what his normal mile time was and he said "Low 10s with a weighted vest."  Zomg... weighted vest?? 30-40 additional pounds?  Wait what? 10 minutes?  You mean that I could probably run a mile or two with you and (1) keep up and (2) not look like death doing it? And so I said "let's make this happen." 

That person is a far cry from the FGvW who was afraid to ask her friends how to start running, what she should be feeling, how to adjust gait, etc.  That person is a far cry from the FGvW who is stuck in a rut on the elliptical.  That person is the FGvW that isn't letting doctors scare her in to worrying about possible injuries when her body is asking for something. 

Last night he sent me a text and asked me if I wanted to go for that run.  Unfortunately, I was asleep (at 6:30 pm) with a doozy of a migraine.  But I'd like to think that I would have said yes.  That's growth. Not bad for a girl the doctors didn't think would be able to stand up straight.