Not For the Faint of Heart or the Faint of Calorie

Barring the chance that you were raised by wolves, you probably had someone (mom/grandma/Dear Abby) tell you to "never show up at a party empty handed."

What if that party comes with an intimidatingly bold title? 

A few weeks ago, I attended (at the suggestion of a friend) a happy hour for a group called Boobs Bacon Bourbon.  Not only is their blog hilarious, but the people are splendid examples of humanity (it also turned out that a friend of mine from HS was a part of the group as well). 

This past weekend, said HS friend invited many of the BBB Social Club (as I am calling them) to a Sunday Funday, and I thought it would be the perfect time to unleash a recipe I've only dreamed about and only now had the courage to share with the world. 

---

That's right -- the BACON CHOCOLATE SALTY OAT COOKIE.

Though initially inspired by the Salty Oat Cookies at Teasim, I cribbed the basic recipe from the Kitchen Ninja, doubled it (original recipe below makes 15 cookies, double made 30) and then made a few changes:

Ingredients:

6-7 ounces thick-cut bacon slices 1/2 lb maple-cured bacon (applewood smoked could also work), cooked and crumbled (reserve some of the delicious bacon fat) (Side note:  I get my bacon at a farmer's market from a local producer, Cibola Farms.  Trust me, happy pigs make delicious bacon) (and yes, I've also done this recipe using a whole pound of bacon).
1-2 tsp ground cinnamon
2 1/4 cups flour
1 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. Kosher salt
1 cup packed brown sugar (dark is best)
2/3 cup granulated sugar
1/2 cup butter, at room temperature
2 eggs
1/2 tsp. vanilla
1 cup old-fashioned oats
2/3 cup raisins
8-10 oz dark chocolate bits

Directions:

Mix the flour, baking powder, salt and baking soda in a bowl and set aside. In a stand mixer, beat the sugars and the butter until blended.  Add the vanilla 1tbsp of the cooled bacon fat and beat the mixer until light and fluffy (this took about 3-4 minutes). Add eggs one at a time, mixing well each time. Slowly add the dry ingredients and mix well. In a separate bowl, coat the cooled bacon in ground cinnamon. Add bacon, oats and raisins chocolate and mix thoroughly.

Let the dough chill in the fridge for a bit before proceeding to baking.

Form the dough into balls using a 1.5 oz disher (yes, this is a BIG dough ball) and place on parchment-lined cookie sheets about 3 inches apart.

---

I packed these delicious cookies up and brought them to Cantina Marina and made some new friends.  One such new friend (Ken) said that they tasted "like god's vagina."  Others wondered why I was just giving them away.  I believe in food diplomacy.  I think the easiest way to make a new friend is to give them something delicious to eat.  These cookies definitely fit the bill.

At a whopping 360 calories per cookie (estimated), I wouldn't necessarily put them in the category of cookie, but I'd consider them a more delicious form of/in the same caloric category as a scone.   Many of my new friends chose to split the cookie a few ways and share over beer.  The diplomat in me could not be more pleased.

I could health them up a bit (I did consider adding Granny Smith apples at one point) or health them down (i did consider marinating the bacon in Jack Daniels), but seriously, why?

I say that if you're willing to put the time and effort in to making a cookie like this, you should be able to eat one guilt-free.  After that, you're on your own.  Now you know why I only make these when I know they'll be shared.

And yes, gents, I'm single.