In the past, I'dve written some really bad poetry, shopped strictly in the ice cream section of the grocery store, and played really depressing music.
The only leftover thing that I really do is the self-analysis -- what could I have done wrong? Why hasn't he called? Was I too aggressive? Was I reading the situation wrong?
But seriously--that's one of just many things to think of while you're running on an elliptical. Until then, he'll just have to come to me... I'll be at the gym.
[[Addendum to the post: so the last time I got my hopes up for a guy was when I "won" him at a charity auction (single, straight, handsome, highly recommended by friends, doctor). His date offering was to cook dinner. I "bought" him for $150, making a deal that if I paid that much, he'd make dinner for me and two friends. We set up a date for said dinner. I emailed him 2 days before that date to confirm the details and I never heard back from him. On that date? I find out he went camping/fishing with friends. I've not heard from him in the year and a half since then. Do I worry about it? No. Do I joke about not even being able to pay for a date? You betcha!]]
[[Addendum #2: Do I even mention the guy I met online (who was much shorter and older than his picture) who was drunk when he arrived, stumbled up to me and said "I can't do this" and then stumbled over to some tiny blond girl and started to chat her up? Probably not... ]]
12 comments
True that, sister. That radio silence, the crickets chirping...what the hell! But yeah, he'll have to come to you...your attitude rocks, FG!
ReplyKeep on truckin'!
I don't know if it's attitude or just me protecting myself... we'll see.... bravado... bravado... bravado...
ReplyRunning... running... running...
i wanted to HATE that book (er, in my case, movie). but it has too much truth! haha, it seriously is the only thing that can keep my mind sane in times like this! boo on him! :(
Replyand i am like you, i use my elliptical time like that too. i just close my eyes and run and run and run. it's a good place to think uninterrupted.
ReplyAnd if he doesn't? Pffffft on him!
ReplyYou just keep running, running, running... (flash to Dory swimming in loops...)
100in28: I kinda hated the book b/c it made women come off as needy, insecure, and pretty mental, but then I realized it was an accurate portrayal of all women at some point in their life. It wasn't us all the time, but every woman has been there.
ReplyI love listening to music when I'm on the elliptical, but my mind goes a mile a minute. I can't listen to things without words or I slow down. I like my music to be at 180-190 bpm. But yeah, sneakers on and my head whereever I want it to be.
Angela: Eh, I can't hate on him quite yet. It wasn't an ideal situation, and he's young. So who knows. Maybe I'm jumping the gun...
And as a side note, I am fluent in whale as well.
I hear ya. I'm tired of chasing men...they now need to come to me!
ReplyWe're worth chasing :)
ReplyI just read this and this is proof that guys CAN suck.
ReplyI can't see what movie you all are referring to, but I think that if a guy doesn't see how fabulous you are within a reasonable amount of time, I figure he did you a favor.
I mean, how many times do we as women struggle while dating a guy. As in, "he's great in this area, but not great in this one and I don't know if that's what I want to settle for" type stuff. This leaves the mental mindf---- out of it. If he doesn't come around, you can move on to the next possible Mr. Right. And really, this guy? IF he doesn't come around, he totally just saved you time. No more wondering if it will work.
More time for the next guy - and more time for the inevitable Mr. Right.
The thing that sucks, IMHO, is that when you JUST start to crack the tougher outer shell that we sometimes have - for the vulnerability to start to peek through - and then get shafted, it hurts. That's what sucks. The vulnerability hurt that has to mend again.
But I promise - a guy as wonderful as you deserve WILL come through. And then you'll be SO glad all the others DIDN'T work out.
The underlined bit (he'll just have to come to me...) links to the book cover of "he's just not into you."
ReplyI 100% agree that you have to go through a few toads until you find a prince, but until you know he's a toad, you want to believe he's a prince.
And you're right -- I took a leap of faith. I put myself out there. I just have to trust that eventually someone will see it. And you're right, I'll be glad that Jason (the cat guy), Mickey (the fighter jet mechanic), Joe (the long-distance cyclist), Dave (the now best male friend and uncle to my teddybear), Greg (the guitarist), Seth (the bisexual wine snob/hockey player), Michael (the older mysterious graphic designer), etc. and so on never worked out.
Hey chica- just tuning into your blog - I actually write a dating blog and talk a lot less publicly about my own struggle with weight. I am down 40 lbs in the last 2 years and am chasing you now in the 190s!
ReplyJust want to say - there will never be enough answers to figure out why guys don't call, all we can do is shrug and move on. I can tell you that it happens to women at every size and it simply makes no sense but it will happen and happen, until it doesn't.
I just wanted to share a post I wrote about weight- and about an awful ex - it barely rivals your stories but I want you to know you're not the only one out there going through this stuff!
http://beentheredating.blogspot.com/2010/07/one-wrong-turn-at-time.html
Excited to keep reading!
xo
Sarah
Oh i know I'm not the only one. I have beautiful friends that look like movie stars having the same problems. I know it's not me. And I know I won't have that problem until I don't have that problem anymore. I'll start following you!
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