You take the good, You take the bad, you take them both....

So in my last post I spoke about being able to know when you're full.  I want to make it very clear that this is my ideal and by no means what I'm able to practice right now for myself.  I am absolutely horrible about knowing when I'm hungry, when I'm full, or otherwise.  I know when there is food and that's when I make up my mind as to whether I want it or not.

Not a single choice I've made for myself today has been based in actual nutrition, meal planning, or knowing where i stand calorically.

Let me explain a little bit -- I'm visiting my dad in NYC for father's day.  We went to the Coney Island Mermaid Parade (dad wanted to go to Luna Park (ever since he was a little kid, but it was a madhouse there).

My eating for the day is as such:
1. a slice of cinnamon raisin bread
2. sausage, 2-egg & cheese on a kaiser roll
3. a few of my dad's fries
4. a rainbow italian ice
5. a Mr. Softee ice cream cone
6. a grande iced tea lemonade with black tea and 1 packet of sugar in the raw
7. spinach salad with shrimp, cranberries, almonds, orange and raspberry vinaigrette
8. a Naturale 90 black cherry soda (almost 2-servings)
9. chocolate mousse cake

So yeah, there it is folks.  That's how you have 3 desserts in one day.
It's been an absolute abomination.  The only upside is that i walked 19,300 steps, burned 3159 calories and got in a little bit of sun.

But seriously... WHAT THE HELL???? I know better than this.

I was halfway through #9 and i said to my dad "You know, I was full after dinner.  I shouldn't have even ordered this and here I am, halfway through it."  And I talked with my brother and father a bit about the nature of emotional eating (I think my dad got it a little bit more than my brother) and then after that, I ate the 2nd half.  **headdesk**

I'm sure we all know better and we can even see ourselves undermining and sabotaging ourselves as we are doing it, but there is something stronger than the new habits we are trying to create - and that is the old habits we're trying to leave behind.

Dad's reply to the whole thing was "well, do better tomorrow" and while yes, I'll do better tomorrow, but I need to figure out why I keep on having so many todays.